Goodbye, world as I know...

How much more do I need to take???

Everyone just expects from me...

When I deliver what they expect they just batt their eyelash and leave as if I am obligated to do something nice to them..

I care so much...

But it seems like no one cares...

What's the point??

I have a lot of friends? Bullshit..

Who really cares as much as I do? Every single move I make I would take so much thought to it..worrying that I might hurt somebody in the end or that the end result would make me lose a friend that I care...But it seems like whatever I do doesn't matter cause no one actually cares...And that everyone has just made the decision in the beginning that I am not worth caring...

I don't crave attention...I just hoped that I would be important to some people just as important they are to me...

Apparently I am just a tool to be taken granted from..

Has anyone of you ever cared for my happiness??

Has anyone of you even bothered to understand what I am really going through??

Has anyone of you ever bothered to help me see my problems take my hand and help me find my way??

Has anyone even helped me realize that I am lost??

I am suppose to be way past the identity crisis stage..

But I am still here..

Somehow I stopped at a point of growth...

It is denial, repression or ignorance..

I have no idea..

I just know I am not growing..

I am not improving..

I am not HAPPY...

Who am I??

What do I really want??

What do I really need??

How can I find the answers to those questions??

Writting this in tears because of a letter that stabbed my heart so deep....